COVID Chronicles, 7-29-20

As we all keep figuring things out during this slow-moving car crash known as the pandemic, I find myself of two minds (maybe more?). On one hand I will admit that the slower pace of these last few months has been beneficial... I am sleeping more consistently, eating better, reading more books of substance, and learning a great deal about how to listen more attentively to my head, heart and body.

All good things, right?? Absolutely. Ho-o-w-e-v-v-e-r-r-r-r... There is also a gnawing dread that lurks just out of range of my consciousness that pops up at inopportune times (often at 3am when I get up to go to the bathroom). It causes my chest to tighten and my mind to spin out various catastrophic scenarios that include delightful things like Social Security disappearing and the world economy collapsing. Melatonin can't kick in fast enough during those anxious moments.

So in the midst of just trying to make a living (thankfully, that part seems to be working... for now), and managing daily life in ever-changing and increasingly bizarre ways, I am also trying to keep my head tentatively above the fray and not stay immersed in a bunker mentality. What do I mean by "above the fray"? Naive as it sounds, I might be trying to make lemons out of lemonade. Or just looking for some ways to remain creative and hopeful amidst daunting unknowns.

Thus I am gently launching at least a few posts to share what that looks like for me week to week. Content will include recipes I am trying out, books I am reading, quotes I am pondering, podcasts or shows or movies I am taking in, and once in awhile, perhaps some BIG THOUGHTS. Tell me what you think.

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FOOD
Like most people (I think?), I am eating at home every day. And as quarantine really got my attention in early April, I discovered something rather jarring when I got my first credit card bill under quarantine: I ate out a lot. A LOT more than I thought. Like, credit-card-balance-nearly-cut-in-half a lot! Sure, some of those meals were work-related meals, and there was a bit of work-related travel, but there was still a fair amount of coffee here, coffee there, quick tacos during errands, meeting friends for lunch, etc. I'm not saying it was horribly wrong; it was just more than was necessary.

So quarantine has got me digging deeper back into patterns I first established during the "Great" Recession of 2009 ("Great" seems pretty minor compared to now... sheesh). I first wrote about it all here in this link. All that to say, I have been recommitting to local produce, eating seasonally and organically as much as I can.

The best place to start is with a membership with a local Community-Supported Agriculture (CSA) program. My hometown favorite is Local Harvest Delivery, which is I LOVE because 1) it gets delivered; 2) I can decline a week if I go out of town or still am trying to eat this week's produce; and 3) I can opt out of the stuff I know I won't eat.

Even then, I still have to push myself to get creative with vegetables I may not have chosen at the grocery store, but are part of what's in season. It's caused me to fall in love with many new vegetables. I'm definitely suffering!

These past two weeks I have made these side dishes, all with CSA veggies:

• Caprese Salad 
• Grilled Cauliflower "steaks" 
• Cucumber Salad
• And yes, Zoodles, with which I covered in a vegan cheese sauce that I found to be quite tasty.

Don't get bored with your cooking ~ get creative.

PODCASTS

I wish I wish I wish I could figure out a way to make a living listening to podcasts. It is hands-down my favorite form of entertainment. I listen to podcasts on bike rides and walks, when I vacuum, when I make my morning coffee, when I brush my teeth at night... you get the picture.

I won't list the MANY podcasts I like and listen to. But here are my three newest favorites:

1. Make Me Smart. A quick 15-minute summary of trends in technology, culture and the economy five days a week. The repartee between the two hosts is natural and enjoyable and, I'm not gonna lie, they make me smart. At least a little bit more.
2. Future Perfect. I'm just digging into this one, but the first one I listened to had me dialed in every. single. minute. It was a fascinating discussion between a rabbi and an agnostic on how to make sense of suffering. It aired July 7. Tune in.
3. Evolving Faith. I'm an unabashed fan of Sarah Bessey and Jeff Chu, the hosts, who co-created the Evolving Faith conference with one of my heroes, Rachel Held Evans. These episodes are from past conferences.

HABITS

I have developed two new habits during quarantine:

• reading poetry and contemplative quotes before going to bed;
• using a writing prompt generator during mental health breaks while working.

HUH? Tell me more, you say?

The poetry and quote reading kicked in sometime in May when anxiety was slowly building and I having a bit of a hard time falling asleep. Regular reading habits weren't cutting it. I needed something to slow me down more. And bring in... Mary Oliver. I truly believe her poetry could quite possibly solve everything wrong in the world. I somehow landed on her compilation Devotions on Kindle for $1.99 and off I went. Now I'm on to Thomas Merton quotes and they are also so good, in an entirely different way. Both access my heart and soul in ways that quiet the little Gnawing Dread Demons that like to taunt me at night, and I am sleeping better.

The writing prompt generator idea came from an article I read on how to fight the struggle to focus and maintain productivity while working from home. So periodically, when I am zoomed-out or SICK of email or who knows what, I will pop open a new tab and plug in this link from self-publishing.com. Try it ~ you might like it.

Final reflection.

I read this this morning as I prayed about my day, not wanting to get so mad at those I do not agree with. It punched me in the gut. In a good way.

“When you understand, you cannot help but love. . . . To develop understanding, you have to practice looking at all living beings with the eyes of compassion. When you understand, you love. And when you love, you naturally act in a way that can relieve the suffering of people.” Thich Nhat Hanh

Thanks for reading. If you're at all interested in my work-related stuff, go to www.ksleadershipdevelop.me. Make it a good week!